there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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