how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
