just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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