My balls are so social today.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
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we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
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Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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