I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
the liver wants what the liver wants
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
