Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
