from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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