THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
