Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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