Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Blow job season was short but glorious.
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So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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