I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
