So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
