I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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