I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
