his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
