I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Randomize