How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
