I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
