I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
