11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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