She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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