it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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