I don't think brook has ever known best
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.