If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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