Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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