so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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