We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
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Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
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If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...