a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
You work out of a Hotel?
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
