I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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