You work out of a Hotel?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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