What a fucking waste of an outfit
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
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