Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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