She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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