you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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