): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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