tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
you made out with another girl for some wings
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
