Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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