She said her name was "party"
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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