the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
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