I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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