he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
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Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
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ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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