if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Non-Jews are for practice
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
