We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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