the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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