Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
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he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
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You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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