the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Randomize