I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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