You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
