He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
