What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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