She announced her abortion via fbk
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize