all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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